If You Really Knew Me, Would You Still Love Me?

Somewhere in Nigeria. 7:45pm.

“Why do you love all, yet commit to none?” asked Lizzy.

The question shot at Rita’s heart like a cold blade. Emotional abuse. Manipulation. The recent incident with Lanre popped on her mind. She looked at Lizzy, “How do I commit to someone before whom I cannot strip?”

“Ah!” Lizzy left her mouth open. “Do you want to have sex?

Rita twitched her lips and shook her head. “Nope! I tremble at a man’s touch not because I’m experiencing an orgasm but because I am afraid that all he cares about is the fun under the sheets. I can only commit to someone I can be vulnerable to. Until then, the emotional walls remain”.

Clothes cover vulnerable body parts. The girdle holds protruding bellies in place, shorts hide balls and brassieres support sagging breasts. Most women wear makeups that cover skin blemishes with lipsticks to cover charred lips.

Same way a lot of folks go into relationships with a lot of fake claims of the reverse of their identities because they want to fit the status quo or fear rejection.

Some wear “clothes” because they don’t trust people. Inwardly they ask, “If you knew me, would you still love me? Can I shatter my image before you and still hold my head high? Can I undress my fears before you and won’t have you leave with a deafening silence? Would you know my mess and not slam the door in my face?”

When I lose a friend, I go through seasons of untold pain. I must confess it is tough. But I realise Moving on is the only I have at my disposal, with forgiveness at the center of my decision realising I had no control of the other party’s decision.

Recently, a lady committed suicide because there was no one to wish her a happy birthday. And I’m forced to ask, “Where were her friends?”

People need friends who will be there for them in spite of their past, present and future. Friends turned Loyalists. Friends who know your mess yet see the best in you. Friends who are willing to get in your face and scold you, if need be. Friends who will support you until your destiny is fulfilled. Friends who would be your Number 2 fan.

If there seem not to be a Loyalist in your life, you can decide to become one to someone today.

Thanks for reading.

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