If God Really Cares, Why Then Am I in Pain?

Faith for Walls was written last year when I read the blockbuster, Holding unto Your Faith When God Doesn’t Make Sense by Dr James Dobson.

My walk with God had hit a rock. My soul was burdened, my spirit crushed. A huge lump lodged in my throat at the time. It beats my imagination how I never suffered a nervous breakdown seeing I held it in, seeking comfort in dark corners and loneliness.

With every fleeting moment, I became suicidal. But as I read through, I resolved to let it all out-guilt, condemnation, mental strongholds and agitations troubling my mind and upsetting my emotions. I discovered solace on a blank piece of paper and a pen.

This was how the fictional character, Anita was created. As her tale wove through my thoughts, my eyes welled up in tears. But I admired her unwavering faith in God as revealed in her final words, “Perhaps God will heal me, but if He doesn’t, I will never let Him go.”

The Weight of Pain

Every human can relate to Pain. Our personal stories are characterized by events that shook us off balance. Something kept us awake when the world went to bed. A trauma caved us in even when freedom beckoned triumphant echoes. A certain dysfunction altered our life scripts.

And some folks seldom know how to manage the pain to a state where it serves a purpose. Tragically, this has led to the significant rise in the rate of suicide across the globe. The psychological distress is life threatening and self murder promises quick relief.

More and more Christians commit suicide when it appears like faith is a game or fraud. God is distant and disillusionment drives the broken soul into the reins of the deepest parts of depression.

Were we not told that accepting Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour meant enjoying all things freely? And that we would be saved from the fiery flames of hell fire? Yet daily events tell otherwise. We haven’t left this plane of existence yet hell is experienced. Permit me to strip off our amour.

Some Christians can barely pay their bills due to abject poverty. Some marriages are a wreck, a destructive habit has taken over some and lots of other unpleasant notions.

The logical mind dares to cry out, “If God really cares, why then am I in pain?”

In God Quest, authors Sean Mc Dowell and Stan Jantz has this to say: “Since most believers know very little about what they believe in, they have a hard time answering a question like that. As a result, the spiritual lives of many people have become all about personal preferences and what makes them feel good about themselves and the world rather than what is true.”

Scattered across Scriptures, God’s people encountered challenges. Abraham, Job, David, Paul. Even Jesus, the Son of God suffered hardships. He died like a condemned criminal. SO, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

God cares about you. Though you pass through the fire and flood, you will not be consumed. In the fullness of time, you will receive beauty for ashes.

God is forever faithful. This too will pass. Be strong.

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